🌙 Holding Space for Your Queen Energy
đź‘‘ What Queen Energy Really Is
After a traumatic event, I think it’s only natural that we dive deeper into ourselves—maybe we go to therapy, pick up a new hobby, or, if you’re like me, go out partying with friends.
Nothing like a good tipsy night with your good Judy’s to help you recenter.
But once that’s worn out—then what?
The silence that creeps in after the distraction fades, after the hangover lifts, after the final session ends—what’s left?
That’s what I’ve been sitting with lately.
And it’s what inspired the first topic of our first Friday Soft Return Reset Ritual:
Holding Space for Your Queen Energy.
As a Black woman, when I hear the word “Queen,” I immediately think: strong, stoic, unphased, unaffected—and definitely not shedding a single tear.
For years, that version of strength shaped how I moved through the world. I subconsciously told myself I was “unbothered” or “not gon’ cry,” and instead of actually feeling my emotions, I just thought through them.
In a recent session with my therapist, I had a realization: I’ve been intellectualizing my emotions. If I can explain the reason behind how I feel, I convince myself I’ve processed it. But in truth, I’ve just dressed it up. I’ve suppressed the feeling with understanding.
Understanding is not the same as feeling.
And when I sat with that, I realized I wasn’t just suppressing emotions—I was suppressing my essence.
A true Queen doesn’t need to dress her feelings in logic. She doesn’t have to explain them away to avoid moments of weakness.
She sits with them. She welcomes them.
She cries when the tears rise—because release is flow.
She lights a candle, draws a bath, and meets herself in the dark, has those hard conversations with her shadow self—not as a victim, but as someone committed to softening.
And when the sun shines, those feelings are illuminated—not with guilt or shame—but with compassion.
That, to me—and to women alike—is our new version of Queen energy.
🪞 How We Give It Away Without Realizing It
When we’re operating from the unhealed version of ourselves—the version that longs for understanding, safety, and completion—we don’t even realize how easily we betray our own essence.
The version that doesn’t allow herself to break.
That reverses her tears when they’re about to fall.
That says “I’m okay” when everything is falling apart.
Self-betrayal doesn’t always look like something loud or obvious.
It happens in small, subtle ways.
When I said “yes” with a tight chest.
When I overexplained my boundaries so I wouldn’t seem mean.
When I accepted less than I deserved just to feel like I had something.
Those little betrayals add up.
It’s why your mind won’t stop racing at night.
Why the anxiety creeps in when the world finally gets quiet.
When we’re in a state of self-betrayal, we’re draining our essence.
We’re giving away our Queen energy without even realizing it.
Today, we recognize the signs—and we change the course.
🌿 How We Reclaim It Softly
Reclaiming my Queen energy hasn’t looked like a grand declaration.
In fact, it’s hard.
It’s ugly.
It’s raw.
It’s looked like my intuition telling me to go—and me leaving, without questioning it.
Without waiting around to see if I was crazy.
It’s looked like being brutally honest with myself.
Saying things like:
“This is the need to be accepted coming up.”
“This isn’t what you really want.”
Letting your emotions flow after years of suppressing them?
It’s foreign.
Staying true to yourself sometimes results in things you don’t want.
But the woman you’re becoming is worth the painful deshedding process.
She’s worth every ounce of discomfort to become exactly who you’ve always imagined you were.
Sometimes, reclaiming your Queen energy looks like lying in bed rewatching Insecure,
reading a good book and putting your phone on DND.
And sometimes, it’s standing in the mirror and whispering:
“Who I truly am is surfacing with every step I take.”
đź’Ś Soft Return Reflection Prompts
Where am I still abandoning myself to feel chosen, accepted, or safe?
What would it look like to honor my Queen energy—even in the smallest way—this weekend?
What has my intuition been whispering that I’ve been too busy or afraid to hear?
✨ Affirmation Set
I honor my softness, my voice, and my inner wisdom. I choose presence over performance, and stillness over striving.
I release the version of me that survived by suppressing. I choose expansion, even when it’s uncomfortable.
My intuition is not a question—it’s a compass. I trust where she leads me. She will never lead me wrong.
🌸🌼 Thanks for Reading
If you’ve made it this far, thank you for holding space with me.
I hope this entry invites you to hold space for yourself—gently, truthfully, and without apology.
Here’s to the return.
To softness.
To the Queen you’re becoming—and you always knew you would be.
Until next Friday. đź’Ś
🎧 A Queen Energy Wind Down Playlist
Sounds for your soft return.
Press play when you’re ready to vibe, wind down, or just need some background music.
✨🎀 Listen Here 🎀✨
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